The art of dealing with professional “Cause I don’t wanna.”



This… is hands down, my favorite picture.


I love capturing moments of unpredictability.   It’s grainy; out of focus, and my poor camera flash can’t illuminate the field… But, what it does do is capture the essence of a child’s “Cause I don’t wanna” moment.

It’s all about the unpredictability of kids at picture time; especially holiday time. It’s complete chaos and I love it. Adults plead: “It will only take a minute, then you can go back to playing. Come on – be logical about this”.   But it’s not about logic; it’s about the emotion of the moment. Sometimes for kids the answer is as simple as “Cause I don’t wanna” and your only recourse is to snap the photo.   Appreciate those moments – they are far more memorable than a perfectly staged picture.

As grownups we all deal with professional “Cause I don’t wanna” on a daily basis. It doesn’t matter what we do for work, it impacts all of us, sometimes without us even noticing. While we may not throw tantrums, adults rather, can dig in their heels and go silent.   Conversation over.   Cause. I. Don’t. Wanna…

Learning to recognize CIDW in our professional lives and how to address it is one of the key factors of successful professionals. The skill of stripping away CIDW to its core component objections and being able to address them individually with a common goal in mind, is a pretty difficult skill to master.

For me, as a Headhunter and small business owner I get CIDW from both sides – client companies as well as candidates.

From clients I hear: “I don’t wanna do business with you.”   “I’ll do business with you but I want a discount.”  “You’re not on our approved vendor list.” From candidates I get: “I don’t wanna talk with you cause the last headhunter was crap.”  “I don’t wanna look at your awesome job that would be great for my career.”    “I’m gonna reject the offer you just got for me.”  And so on, and so on.

It’s a constant challenge that I enjoy, but not once in my two years of entrepreneurship has the answer presented itself with out a little digging.   Maybe you think I’m too expensive? Maybe you don’t know me and therefore don’t trust me?   Maybe you just had a bad meeting and want to be done with people for the day?  Who knows??   These CIDW moments are all cue’s to tactfully dive a little deeper to get to the root cause of the objection.

I always go back to – What are we trying to accomplish?   In my case: You (Client) need to hire someone.   I (Headhunter) can make it happen for you. With that as our base – let’s work something out!  If we have the same core goal it’s much easier to get to the root causes of CIDW.

Holiday season can be stressful for everyone.   As we work through our days, let’s recognize CIDW for what it is, and take the time to understand core objections.   It’s certainly helped me during the past few years and especially now as we approach holiday time.

Happy Holidays, and keep a sharp eye out for CIDW in yourself and in others. It makes getting stuff done far easier and the process much more enjoyable!


Happy holidays to all and a great 2016!!!